Printer Problem Perplexes Staff
Yelling Proves to be Prime Solution

(Rockville, MD) — Printer problems? Want a sure-fire solution? Berate your staff!

A Hewlett-Packard LaserJet 4350 recently went on the fritz, causing pandemonium, consternation and other types of chaos for hours on end. Calls to technical support went unnoticed. Calls to management were rebuffed. Staff were at a loss regarding what to do next.

"One of the staff just started screaming at other staff," said an NRC staff member, speaking on condition of anonymity. "They were foaming at the mouth. I thought their head might unscrew from their neck. They were just treating their colleagues like underlings. And they kept demanding the Printer Test Page from the printer, storming throughout the office, and actually ripped the Printer Test Page out of someone's hand before it was all over. But I guess it worked. I mean, the printer is now working again. Go figure."

The NRC Customer Support Center (CSC) is looking into the matter. An NRC report, or NUREG, might be released once the data is compiled, said a CSC spokesman, speaking on condition of anonymity.