Official Names for NRC Headquarters Buildings Announced
Naming Alleviates Confusion over HQ Building Acronyms

(Rockville, MD) — The construction of its third headquarters building underway, the Nuclear Regulatory Commission (NRC) has announced the name for the new building, and in doing so, has also renamed its existing buildings.

The impetus, according to an NRC official, speaking on condition of anonymity, was the real possibility of extreme confusion over the acronyms currently used for the two existing buildings. "One White Flint North is 'OWFN' and Two White Flint North is 'TWFN'. If Three White Flint North were designated 'TWFN', it would be nothing short of total chaos and confusion."

Those who closely follow the agency will be happy to know that there will be no mayhem, confusion or pandemonium. The acronyms above will no longer be used, and the official names of the buildings will be considerably shortened.

"One White Flint North will now be known as 'Mordor'," continued the NRC official, speaking on condition of anonymity. "Two White Flint North will now be known as 'Mount Doom' ... and Three White Flint North will be known as 'Isengard' when it is finished. We hope that these names will eliminate any confusion. The commissioner's new assistant, Sméagol, certainly thinks the new names are precious."