Special Daily Celebrations Make for a Diverse Workplace

(Rockville, MD) — A recently-released diversity assessment report has caused a buzz amongst NRC staff. While relatively few commended the report for its honesty and up-front reporting style, others criticized the report as not going far enough. One NRC employee, speaking on condition of anonymity, said it "could have been written by a pack of drunken lemurs" when discussing its plethora of grammatical errors.

The assessment cited room to improve, both for employees and managers. But it also identified existing efforts meant to foster improved communication and boost staff morale. As an example, the report pointed out that "thanks and compliments" are offered one day a week.

"We believe that offering congratulatory messages helps to improve morale, even more than pitting employees against employees," said an agency manager, speaking on condition of anonymity. "But we don't really want to offer such messages more than once a week. After all, we don't want employees to think they're more valuable than, say, managers. Or carbon paper."

The report did not state what was specifically to be offered the other days of the week, but thanks to the fact-finding report, management has spelled out different rewards to round out the week:

It is too early to tell if these rewards will drive genuine appreciation for employees and an improvement in workers' morale. Judging from the follow-up comments coming from employees, management may have a long way to go.

"In an all-hands meeting a couple of years ago, I heard a CIO refer to the workers as 'you who are to be led,'" said an NRC employee, speaking on condition of anonymity. "About a year later, during another all-hands meeting, the previous CIO's successor remarked that the division 'leans on our most-talented employees – our managers – to drive success.' As if that wasn't bad enough, it feels like the managers drive their employees in many ways ... into varying states of dementia and physically manifested disease. With all this driving, it's no wonder the traffic doesn't allow management to see the forest for the trees."